Yep, writing notes out has always helped me remember stuff, and I have never once gone back to look at my notes. I would pretty much write out the notes and then chuck them in the trash.
If you're writing a paper on a book, it's good to mark the shit up IN the book. Specially for the Prim Source evidence. Use stickies. In a case like that, use differnet color stickies for different elements of your paper (obv depending on what kind of paper youre writing). Could be for different thematic elements + a character. Could even JUST be the thematic element. Could be a tie to a specific secondary source or other parallel novel that is extremely important to your paper.
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Rewording the information also requires you to process and understand it. That is a big part of why writing notes out helps you remember stuff. So in writing notes, NEVER just copy what the teacher has on the board or what is in the text verbatim! If you do, paraphrase it right under the quote and extrapolate. Also, WaLLy, you got a wife. Talk to her about the shit you're reading. Explaining it to someone else will help you learn it really really quickly. It'll also force you to try and make it interesting, and then you'll like it more. And, if you get a positive response for your spouse, that will be a reward for your efforts, which, whether you like it or not, will make you enjoy the subject and learning it more. Explaining it to someone will also force you to notice the holes in what you remember. Teaching something is one of THE best ways to learn it.